A Letter to my Daughters – 10 Tips for Life

 

Dear Girls,

I was watching you today, both of you.  You were simply playing in the yard being carefree kids.  That’s when it hit me, the fact that you are both growing so fast.  Before long you will be young women.  I’m not going to lie the thought scared me just a little. Right now I can train you and mold you but the final outcome of your life will be up to you.  Soon you will have to forge your own trail and while I will be there for guidance, you will choose your own path.  One day you may decide not to listen to dear old mom but here are a few important things I would like you to remember as you grow.

1).  God always shows up, just in time. 

Maybe not how you planned and maybe not how you wanted, but he will show up just the same.  Build your life on an unshakable faith and pour your soul into His calling for you.  The rest will follow.  Let him mold you into the women you are meant to be and then give your all to Him.  My greatest desire is that you have a steadfast relationship with the Lord, the rest is just icing on the cake.

2).  You have to work for your dreams.

If you want something go get it.  It would be nice to live in a world of freebies but the truth is life is hard work.  Don’t sit around and wait for things to be handed to you. Also, God is not a genie.  Don’t expect him to hand you the answers to your prayers.  Sometimes you have to give your prayers feet and work for the answer.  Don’t expect a hand out from anyone.

3).  You are not the center of the universe.

Sorry but you’re not.  Your dad and I probably seem like we say “no” too often.  It’s because we see so many young adults who were told “yes” a few too many times.  Please don’t sit around and cry when things don’t go your way.  We live in a world full of people and everyone cannot be the center of the universe.  Part of being an adult is learning that life will hand you disappointments.  You have to learn to deal with them and then move on.  Don’t compromise your beliefs, but don’t expect everyone else to always be on board either.  Also, don’t expect a trophy for simply existing; if you want a trophy do something to earn it.

4).  People will disappoint you.  Move on.

Eventually it will happen, you will put your faith in the wrong person and they will let you down.  Who knows, that person could even be me!  Don’t ever hinge your hopes and dreams on other people because even the best people can’t achieve perfection.  I love you with my WHOLE heart but the chances are good that eventually even I will disappoint you.  Forgive, forget, and move on.

5).  Don’t chase your dreams so much that you forget to live.

Sometimes we worry about the “next big thing” so much that we forget to enjoy where we are.  We look forward to driving, to graduating, and to the college degree.  Then there’s marriage and children.  Next comes vacations and holidays.  Eventually, we hope to retire and travel.  See, there is ALWAYS the next best thing. Planning for the future is always smart but don’t forget to enjoy where you are now.  Savor it and drink it all in because you can’t get it back once it’s gone. Trust me, that will be faster than you think.

6).  It’s okay to “just” be a wife & mother.

This one was the hardest for me.  I wanted to climb the corporate ladder so I poured years into an education and then a career.  Then this tiny bundle of joy came along that made me change my priorities.  Years ago I decided to be a stay at home mom.  I have been made to feel “less than” over and over again for my choices.  I’ll be honest, there have been times when even I wondered if I made the right decision.  Being “just” a mom means that we survive on one income and that I give my life to my family 24/7.  “Adult time” is usually unheard of, especially when you have little babies.  Despite it all, THIS is the greatest job I have ever had.  See for me the price of working was more than I was willing to pay.  Maybe you will choose to pursue a career and be wildly successful, or maybe you will be “just” a mom.  I will be proud either way.  Don’t ever let anyone make you feel “less than” for your decision.

7).  Your character is your responsibility alone.

As a homeschool mom, I pour my whole life into you.  Day in and day out you get most of my time, as well as my thoughts.  I can mold you and I can shape you but who you become will be your choice, not mine.  I will always give my advice and point you in the direction I think is best but in the end, you have to make your own decisions.  You will be responsible for your life.  Your character will outlast anything else you have here.  Make sure it is a legacy worth leaving behind.

8).  Show respect to everyone you meet.

I don’t care if they are rich or poor, young or old, what religion, or what color skin they have.  Everyone deserves your respect.  We were not put here to belittle or tear each other down.  How you treat the “less thans” in this world is really just a reflection of who you truly are.

9).  Time has a value.

We are all given the same amount of it, but how you spend it is totally up to you.  When it’s gone, it’s gone for good.  Spend it wisely. Make deposits into things that matter and let go of the things that don’t.  Sometimes this means saying no to things, even if you feel guilty for doing it.

10).  Don’t let failures defeat you.

Henry Ford said, “Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.”  This is so true.  You will face many failures in your life and that’s okay.  Just pick yourself up and move on.  The failures aren’t the problem; it’s when you fail to try again.

So there you have it 10 tips for life.  Maybe you will ignore them or maybe you will take them to heart.  Whatever you decide, always remember that I love you.  I am sad to see you grow but at the same time, I can’t wait to see what you become.